It was in 1999, and I was 8 years old at this time. My mom, my step-dad, and I all went over to my aunt’s house for a cookout. She didn’t live far from us but yet it felt like this was going to be such an exciting day. I knew that some more of my cousins would be there to play with and we would just enjoy this day. I was so focused on having fun that I never thought that this particular day would change all of my days later to come.
When we first arrived I was happy to be there since this is my favorite aunt’s house. Everyone was either in the kitchen or outdoors, but I was inside with the adults. A little after 20 minutes of being there we heard a noise in the bushes, but we knew it wasn’t anyone outside because they were all in the front or had came back inside. We never quite paid that noise any attention because we thought that it could’ve just been a dog or something. So not long after this everyone moved into the living room, to talk, dance, and enjoy themselves.
About an hour after all of this, out of nowhere I began to cry. Everyone kept asking what was wrong, but I just kept begging my mom to please take me home. My aunt begged me not to leave but I still wanted to go. She offered me money and lots of other things to stay, but I continued to cry and beg to leave. So we left, but keep in mind this is my favorite aunt.
When we got home, I got ready for bed and went to sleep. I don’t think I was asleep for more than three hours when I heard a big commotion and banging at my front door. I awoke but I didn’t move instead I just lay in the bed and listened. I heard some of my family members crying and talking, as well as my mom. At that moment, I got out the bed and ran into the living room. I asked what was going on but my step-dad told me to go get dress. So I did as I was told, but I was crying because my mom was crying and I was scared.
After I returned from getting dressed, I found out that my aunt had just been killed. This was the worst moment ever in my life, and I will never forget it. I had just left her side not more than six hours before. I was devastated and I just couldn’t believe that this was true. We had to go and tell my grandma, and from there we went to the hospital, where her body was. Still I didn’t think this was true until I saw her body laying there in a body bag.
This hurts me so much because when I kept crying my heart knew that something was about to happen and it was warning me to get away. Even now sometimes I still cry when I’m alone and wonder what would’ve happened if I had of stayed. Would she still be here today? There’s a hole in my heart that will always be there because she would’ve done anything for me or gave me anything she could since I was "her heart." Don’t get me wrong; I’m not blaming myself for what occurred, but she didn’t deserve that. She was just an innocent person who wanted a good life for her and her kids. She was stabbed numerous times because she didn’t want some of her kids’ father anymore. The noise we had heard earlier in the bushes was him watching her to see who all was around at that time.
When you love someone let him or her know because you don’t ever know when your last visit with them will be. This is something that I will always remember because I loved her but I never got a chance to tell her until it was too late. It has shaped my life uniquely since now I don’t take things for granted because I don’t ever know when it’s going to be taken away from me. I let my mom know every day that I love her because I wouldn’t ever want this same thing to happen again because I didn’t speak up or show my emotions. Life is precious and I try to cherish every moment.
Now that I’ve came of age more I understand much more about life. I realize that it wasn’t my fault because whether I stayed or not, he had already planned out what he wanted to do to her. But my crying helped push it off a little longer since she had company. I miss her but I know she’s still watching over me each and every day.
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